More BGO stuff

[sineG yuG lareneG]

Hypnotic Trance

You put on your Hypno Glasses and stare into the dragon's eyes. She immediately realises what you are trying to do and becomes enraged! Ah shit!


Angry Dragon

The dragon breathes huge flames and roars!



What do you do?



Ho Dragon Ho!

You calm down the dragon with your soothing words about a world filled with mighty dragons. A paradise even! The angry dragon seems to like the story and calms down a bit...





Story Time

You approach the dragon and begin talking...

You tell the story of the great dragons of Westeros. You go into detail about how these mighty beasts from the Shadow Lands were both feared and admired.

The dragon looks enthusiastic! You told a great story, which is logical since you're a Targaryen!





Pleased Dragon

The dragon insists on giving you something before you leave. She pushes forward a tiny bag of Rupees and a Magic Crystal.

item

You count 8 Rupees in the tiny bag as you leave the Cave. Sweet!




Baloo

Baloo comes dancing through the jungle!

'Look for the bare necessities, the simple bare necessities...'

What do you do?




Baloo's Back Rub

You scratch Baloo's back while he's humming some jungle tunes! He picks a Banana and a Lemon and tosses them to you!

itemitem

Baloo is awesome!




Baloo's Back Rub

You scratch Baloo's back while he's humming some jungle tunes! He picks a Banana and a Lemon and tosses them to you!

itemitem

Baloo is awesome!



Fire Jumping

This is ritual fire, pale-face. Jump fire to succeed. Remember now: speed is the key!

You take a sprint and take the jump! You feel some flames singe your ass, but you made it! All the Indians clap and you gained some reputation.
Continue




The Cave

You walk into the Cave rumoured to have a dragon inside and it slowly gets darker around you...

Continue




Humanslayer

Dragons in caves are there to be slain! You take up your Sword and lunge yourself at the dragon!

You strike her neck with your Sword as hard as you can! You slice her mighty, scaled belly! Finally, you strike her with a mighty blow to the head! Your Sword breaks, but the dragon is not yet slain! She roars in pain and eats you alive!

Ouch...
Continue




King Louie

You come across King Louie and his band of monkeys. He orders you to stick around for a jazzy party!

Alright

Give him something he likes!




Banana!

You give King Louie your Banana. He seems kind of pleased with it and he lets you go. Good, because you have more important things to do than party...

Continue



Saruman The Grey

[Image]http://s2.boardgame-online.com/g/images/event/sarugrey.jpg
You stand in front of Saruman the Grey.

'What is this magic? I was never the Grey. Never! You, mortal... you will pay for Gandalf's foolishness. Choose how you will suffer!'
Move backwards
Become incapacitated
Receive a Lesser Curse




Incapacitation

Saruman whacks you on the head with his wooden staff.

'Foolish mortal! Your kind deserves no love from eternals!'

Ouch!




King Louie Knows How To Party

You are forced to party with King Louie all night long and you have to skip a turn before you can continue again.

Continue



Gorilla

A giant gorilla runs towards you! What do you do?
Scream for help

Wait. Gorillas like bananas, right?


If only you had a Banana...




Banana!

You toss your Banana at the angry gorilla. The gorilla seems impressed by your gift and tosses you 8 spaces forward.

Continue





Trading

You enter the chieftain's wigwam. Or tipi. Or teepee. You're never quite sure.

Let's see if he wants to trade.
Continue



Flee!

The tribe's war party tries to scalp you! You flee 20 spaces back!
Continue





Full Of Win

You find yourself aboard the Starship Enterprise. You notice captain Picard, have a nerdgasm, try to look cool and accidentally fire a photon torpedo at a nearby enemy Cardassian warship.
[Image]
Picard hands you a Phaser and a Teleporter for your heroic deed!

itemitem





Torch

You wave the Torch around at the Bear!

The bear is quite scared of the fire and stops running...

In which direction do you scare the bear?
BackwardForward








Baboons

You follow the tracks and find a troop of baboons! They seem to be in the mood for some dancing! What do you do?

Dance!




Lemon

You toss your Lemon to the Bear! He sniffs at it, and runs on! It seems this bear is not really interested in lemons.

Run!




Flask of Mojo

You enter the bathroom of the Brothel and notice a small flask lying on the ground. You pick it up, and the label reads Flask of Mojo...

item

You wonder what this potion does...



Successful Trade

The chieftain takes your item and nods. You take a crystal and leave the wigwam.
Continue



Tasty Chicken

You offer the angry dragon your Chicken. She breathes flames from her nostrils as she sniffs the animal. She then devours it in one big gulp!

The dragon is pleased and calms down a little.
Continue




Tasty Cow

You offer the dragon your Cow. She looks very pleased with your gift and devours it in one big gulp!

The dragon is very happy and insists on giving you a part of her hoard. She gives you 9 Rupees and a Magic Crystal!

item

Hurray!





Terrorists!

You walk around, happily humming and suddenly find yourself in a terrorist hideout! A large group of masked terrorists stop talking and stare at you.

You do you best to convince them of your best intentions and try to convince them not to kill you, since you are like-minded...

Who do you want to send them after?
Send them after Tarzan!
I don't want to send them after anybody!




Go After Tarzan!

You try your best and manage to convince the terrorists to go after wicked Tarzan! Unfortunately the terrorists get lost in the Jungle and never manage to find him...

Continue



Shimmering Magic

'There you go! I have charged your Orb and turned it into a Shimmering Orb. It will generate a random spell every 3 turns for 9 turns. Use it for evil, little girl!'

Awesome!



Staff

'Choose a single spell to charge your Staff with. Charging a Staff will cost you a lot of money, but you'll be able to cast that spell forever every 9 turns. An amazing investment!'

[sineG yuG lareneG]

Eyes In The Bush

You think you saw some eyes in the bush, but when you make your way through it nothing seems to be there. You hear something behind you and you turn! Again... nothing is there. Then you see the monster...

[Image]


What do you do?
Run away
Roar and scream
Roll in the mud
Climb into a tree





Jungle Beast

You try to roar but you're too scared and the monster isn't impressed... He kills you and runs off.

Continue



Success

You bump your head a few times, but you finally manage to find a way out of the dark cave. Hurray!

Continue


Reinforcements Activation Panel

A mechanical door opens in the ground and some kind of panel with a touch screen rises from it.

Welcome, ambassador. Please choose an item that all players should receive.



Alright, let's click one of the buttons.



Night Vision Goggles

You press a button. Suddenly planes fly over your head to deliver Night Vision Goggles to every player in the game!

item

Yay for free stuff!




Lucky Mood

You drink your Liquid Luck. Ahhh, that tastes divine. The dragon appears to be in a terribly good mood today and insists on giving you a ride. You fly 19 spaces forward on the mighty dragon's back! Lucky!
Continue



Malaria Mosquito

A mosquito lands on your arm and sucks some blood. You feel a bit queasy and get infected with Malaria!

Fuck you, mosquito!

Continue


Buy Malaria Medicine

You visit a hospital because you got infected with Malaria. The doctor has some malarose pills that are guaranteed to cure you, but they cost 3 Rupees.

Do you want to buy the medicine?
Yes
No



No Medicine?

You don't want to buy any medicine? You must be very confident to overcome this disease yourself...

Continue



Cured!

You buy the malarose pills and start treating yourself. You're cured in no time!

Continue




Pocket Ball, GO!

You throw your Pocket Ball at the sucker! The Mosquito gets sucked in your Pocket Ball. Now you can make life suck for others as well!

Success!



Freshly Hatched

You have just hatched and you're hungry! It would seem that your daddy has barfed some corn all over your little brother. He's covered in pigeon vomit. Damn, your father can be so radical sometimes! What to do, what to do...
Eat it! Eat it all!
No. No way.



Ewwww, No Thanks

You're not gonna eat barf from your brother's body. That's disgusting! Your other siblings seem to think otherwise and eat it all. Dang, you feel kind of weak and hungry now...

Continue
You gain 1 karma.



A Puddy Tat?

You're a pretty lousy pigeon and you're hungry. You've managed to get stuck inside some kind of shed, but at least there seems to be food in here! What to do, what to do?

Eat old, half-eaten muffin
Eat furry black stuff
Eat contents of container with human skull



Poison

Really? You want to eat the stuff that's inside the container with the human skull icon on it? Be my guest! You eat some of the purple stuff inside the container and instantly feel sick. You black out a few moments later...

Yeah, that was stupid.

Continue
You gain 1 karma, so now you have 2 karma.



City Pigeon

You have matured into a City Pigeon. You fly around New York City and feel the sudden urge to poop. Excellent! Now all you need is a proper target. What is it going to be?
A little girl
A man in a business suit.
A half-eaten muffin.
A guy running a hotdog stand.
Do not poop.



No Poop For You!

You decide not to poop.

...wait! You decide NOT to poop?! What kind of nonsense is that? You are a disgrace and the other pigeons frown as you fly by. You should be ashamed!

Continue
You gain 1 karma, so now you have 3 karma.



Food

You are feeling feeble and look around the street for food. What will you eat?
Dirt
Old McNuggets
An angry German Shepherd
Nothing




Angry German Shepherd

You... I... I have no words. You are a pigeon. A... Never mind. You are... the WORST pigeon in the history of fucking everything ever! Pigeons do NOT eat ANGRY. GERMAN. SHEPHERDS. Fuck my life. You know what? You just die. You try to eat it and the angry german shepherd just eats you. Well done. Really.

Get the fuck out of here!
Continue


Subterranean Stream

You walk up to a subterranean stream. You let your hand slide through the cold, crystal clear water.
Leave


Going Out

You leave the Cave.
Continue



Crushed!

You quietly walk up to the dragon's nest. However, the dragon notices you and becomes enraged! The dragon swipes her huge claws at you! You are crushed by her mighty paws and die.
Continue




The Dark Room

You stand in front of the dark room. 'Ohhhh yeah. Come inside, baby!' says a sexy voice.
Before you enter, you peek around the corner with your Night Vision Goggles, and Alizée seems to be inside...
So, do you want to enter for a nice bit of sex?
YesNo



Jungle Path

You follow the path through the jungle 5 spaces forward and...

Continue




Maya Symbol

You find an old Maya Temple, but the entrance is caved in. You walk around it and come across an old pendant. It seems to be imbued with holy magic and you take it with you. You now have an Ankh of Resurrection!

Continue




Witch Doctor

You find a small hut in the middle of the Jungle. It has some voodoo signs outside so it probably belongs to a Witch Doctor. You don't dare to go inside, but there's a small glass vial lying about. You take it with you.

item

You decide you probably shouldn't drink it.




Lesser Curse

Saruman holds his wooden staff up in the air and shouts an incantation.

'Feel my power, human. Suffer damnation!'

You are cursed with Curse of Riches.
Continue



King Leonidas

You find yourself in the presence of the fierce Spartan King Leonidas. His battle fury is unmatched, his manliness greater than in the stories. To be fair, you swoon a little.

'You look like you have a fight in you. Have you come to stand by us in the upcoming battle?'

item

King Leonidas teaches you the THIS IS SPARTA skill. You boil with fury and are ready to stop taking shit from anyone foolish enough to encroach on your lands!
SPARTA



March Forth, Orcs!

Saruman orders a group of Orcs to drag you back 10 spaces.

'March forth, Orcs! Get this mortal out of my sight!'

Continue




Lost In The Jungle

You followed the path but now it seems like you are wandering randomly through the Jungle. At some point you think about turning back, but the forest is so dense you can't even see where you came from...

You decide to follow the sun and after a short while you come across a sign. You follow the direction it points to and...

Continue



Reincarnate

You reincarnate as a spotted hyena!
[Image]

You will now gain karma by living according to your dharma. Spiritual, eh?

Make sure you gather as much karma as you can. You will reincarnate again if you gather 4 karma!



s2.boardgame-online.com/g/images/event/reinc_hyena.jpg



Submissive Behavior

You make yourself small and whine pathetically, being as submissive as you can. Uncle Gnarly seems unsure what to do for a while. Eventually he smiles and walks up to you. Your mother, having heard your whining, shows up just in time to save you from your uncle's deadly teeth. Your mother bites uncle Gnarly severely and forces him to leave with deep wounds. Damn, uncles are assholes!

Continue
You gain 1 karma, so now you have 1 karma.



Hungry

You're hungry... what do you do?
Eat from a cadaver you found
Collect a hunting party to hunt wildebeest
Kill a sunbathing crocodile



Tasty

You enjoy the cadaver. There was still quite a bit of meat on it and luckily you were the only one who was near. Om nom nom!

Continue
You gain 2 karma, so now you have 3 karma.



Mating

You're a female hyena and it's mating season!

What do you do?
Look for a strong old male
Look for an aggressive male
Look for a submissive young male

Reincarnate

You get shot by a human who's on a hunting safari. Sucky, huh?

At least you reincarnate as a human again!
Continue



A Blue Dragonling

You press a button. Suddenly planes fly over your head to deliver a Blue Dragonling to every player in the game!

item

Yay for free stuff!
Continue

[sineG yuG lareneG]

Run!

You try to defend yourself with your Shield, but the bear doesn't seem to mind...

Run!




Rent=a=pult:
Dungeon!

You get thrown into a dark dungeon because you didn't have enough money. Let's celebrate by skipping a turn.
Continue



Grumpy

Oh fuck, it's Grumpy!

'What the FUCK?! Stealing our diamonds, huh? You pathetic little fucker... I'm gonna cut you... cut you until you DIE!'

You run out of the Cave and move back 8 spaces.
Continue




Predator

You roll in the mud and the creature seems to have lost you for a moment. It appears he has some kind of heat vision and since you're covered in cold mud you are invisible to him now.

Good, now FLEE




You Got Away

You run like hell and leave the Jungle. You lost the beast and you're glad to be alive...

Continue



Steal From Yourself

You unleash the card's magic upon yourself!

Nothing happens, and you still have 286 Rupees.

Continue




Treasure

You walk through the Cave and see something shining in the distance. When you walk closer you see a Shield and 7 Rupees in a treasure chest!

item

Wow, that's some nice treasure! You put it all in your bag and leave the Cave.
Continue





Sisterly Love

You are a young hyena pup, born with your eyes open and nice sharp teeth! You look around you and notice your sister. What do you do?
Kill the little bitch!
Give her a sisterly hug
Go to sleep




Free Hugs!

You walk up to your sister and hug her intensely. You even throw in a few sisterly licks and a smile. The other hyenas, and especially your sister, look at you funny. At the very least they seem less in the mood to kill you than before, but you certainly didn't impress anyone...

Continue
You gain 1 karma, so now you have 1 karma.




Hunting Party

You gather a hunting party and set out together. You approach a herd of wildebeest and surround it. You all charge in, causing the wildebeest to scatter. You can easily pick off a young wildebeest and your entire party eats well! Not only do you eat well, but you've also gained the respect of your peers!

Continue
You gain 2 karma, so now you have 3 karma.



Strong Old Male

You pick a strong old male, and all the other hyena females laugh at you! Female hyenas like submissive males you idiot!

Continue
You gain 1 karma, so now you have 4 karma.




Aliens!

You see a UFO fly over you... Suddenly a tractor beam emerges from the spaceship! You feel how it's pulling you in!

Your cow gets sucked in for the aliens to experiment on! Poor Bessy...




Squeal

You squeal in frustration, and your owner notices you. He feeds you some milk out of a bottle. Yummy! You go to sleep feeling satisfied.
Continue

You gain 2 karma, so now you have 2 karma.




I Feel Good!

Damn, you feel good!

The following effects have been removed from you:
Curse of Lesser Resurrection.




Spicy Dinner

You give the dragon your Explosive Sheep. She seems pleased and devours it in one big gulp. She smiles at you for a few seconds when...

KABOOM!

The Sheep explodes in her stomach! The dragon becomes incredibly angry and roars in pain!

Uh oh...



Tasty Chicken

You offer the angry dragon your Chicken. She breathes flames from her nostrils as she sniffs the animal. She then devours it in one big gulp!

The dragon is pleased and calms down a little.
Continue



Crushed!

You quietly walk up to the dragon's hoard. However, the dragon notices you and becomes enraged! The dragon swipes her huge claws at you! You are crushed by her mighty paws and die.
Continue




Saruman The White

[Image]
You stand in front of Saruman the White.

'You'd be wise to fear me, mortal. For I am Saruman the White, and the reign of man has come to an end. How will you suffer?'
Move backwards
Lose 1 Speed
Die
Receive a Greater Curse




Death

Saruman holds his ivory staff up in the air. You feel your soul slipping out of your body.

'Mortality is weakness. Your kind will be wiped from this earth.'

You die.
Continue



Wake up!

You kick the brown beast between the legs! Hah, that ought to wake him up...

When you hear him roar in pain you decide it better to run out of the Cave!
Continue




Pet Bear

You use your Improbability Device and strange enough the Bear suddenly looks quite friendly...

You scratch the bear under his chin and take him with you as a Pet Bear.

Continue



How do you want your Pet Bear to aid you?

Catch Fish
If you are near fishable Water, your Pet Bear will catch a Fish.

Roar
Your Pet Bear will scare away any nearby players (Range: 5 spaces).

Ride Forward
You will ride forward 2-3 spaces on your Pet Bear. It may not be far, but IT'S FLUFFY!




Spicy Dinner

You give the angry dragon your Explosive Sheep. She roars and devours it in one big gulp. She blows smoke at you for a few seconds when...

KABOOM!

The Sheep explodes in her stomach! The dragon roars in pain!

Uh oh... The dragon swipes her mighty claws at you and crushes every bone in your body. You die.
Continue


Uncle Gnarly

You're a young pup and it would seem you don't have brothers or sisters. Luckily you have an uncle! There's uncle Gnarly now! What do you do?
Attack!
Be submissive
Run to find your mother




Mommy!

You immediately run off for your mother. She's the only one who can protect you from evil hyenas like uncle Gnarly. You'd better stay close to her until you're ready to dominate the other hyenas!

Continue
You gain 2 karma, so now you have 2 karma.



Scar's Fall

It would seem that your clan has been aiding a lion called Scar in a plot to overthrow king Mufasa. In a crazy turn of events, his long lost son Simba showed up and you witness Scar being thrown off of Pride Rock. What do you do?
Eat Scar with your clan
Flee
Confront Simba



Simba

You tell your clan to attack Simba, but you get intercepted by a group of lionesses. They rip you all aparts. Man, lions are stronger than hyenas. Who'd have thought?
Continue




Crack In The Wall

While walking through the Cave you notice a crack in the wall. You might be able to blow a hole if you have some explosives.
Leave the Cave

Use an explosive to blow a hole in the Cave:



Crack Blown Up

You take a good look at the crack and stuff your Spider Mine into it! After about 15 seconds you blow a big hole in the wall!

When you walk through the hole you find a shortcut and move forward 14 spaces!
Continue



M. Bison

You bump into M. Bison! He looks you over and shakes his head.

'That's not how a winner should walk! A real winner gloats over the misfortune of his enemies, just like I do when I beat those miserable Street Fighters. Here, let me show you how it's done...'

item

M. Bison has taught you the Yes! Yes! skill!




Jungle Beast

You try to run away, but the monster is too fast. He kills you and runs off.

Continue



Vine

You swing 2 spaces forward on the vine and...

Continue




Ace Ventura

You found Ace Ventura in the middle of the Jungle! He seems to be running some sort of illegal animal business. What do you want to do?

Explore the Jungle




Ace In The Jungle

You spend the day following Ace around until you lose him in the Jungle. Well, that was useless.

Continue



Tarzan's Jungle Cocktail

'Tarzan makes jungle cocktail for stranger. You drink.' says Tarzan, while handing you half a coconut with cocktail. Wanna drink it?

YesNo



Crack Blown Up

You take a good look at the crack and release your Explosive Sheep near it! After a few seconds you blow a hole in the wall!

When you walk through the hole you find a shortcut and move forward 15 spaces!
Continue



Terrorists!

You walk around, happily humming and suddenly find yourself in a terrorist hideout! A large group of masked terrorists stop talking and stare at you for a moment.

You join the conversation since you're wearing a Balaclava and convince them of your best intentions...

Who do you want to send them after?
Send them after Tarzan!
I don't want to send them after anybody!




Escape The Terrorists

You don't want to send them after anybody? Well, that's not so smart! The terrorists become really angry and you run 13 spaces back to escape their wrath!

Continue




Crystal Formation

You almost cut yourself on a Crystal Formation. This would be a good time to use your Mining Pick!
Leave the Cave



Mine Crystals

You swing your Mining Pick at the Crystal Formation!

You take a Dark Crystal and a Fairy Crystal with you.

item item



Sail Along?

You walk onto the Pirate Ship. The Captain looks you over in a strange way and says: 'Ahoy, we could use a girl like you on the ship, yarrrrrrrrr!'
What do you say?
I'll join you!
Nah, I'd rather stay ashore




Away With Ye!

Then get off me ship, landlubber!
Continue




Doc

Doc is inspecting his diamonds. He seems to throw away the other crystals!

'Well, hello there! My, you're a tall one! Interested in trading one of your curious items for one of my Crystals?'
Continue



Trade Successful

Doc nods and accepts your offer. He hands you a Crystal.

item - > item




Ice

You walk through the Cave when notice something frozen inside a big ice formation. This could be something really old. Maybe even from the prehistory!

If only you could melt the ice...
Leave the Cave

Use an item to melt the ice:



Ice

You melt the ice with your Torch and it melts away slowly!

When the fire dies out you find a Dark Scroll: Cursed Wounds!

item

Awesome!





Tin Foil Hat

[Image]
Vladimir Putin gives you a nice, warm Tin Foil Hat.

item




Sleepy

Sleepy was busy mining a big rock, but... he fell asleep. Hmmm, maybe that rocks contains diamonds!
Wake Sleepy
Leave

Time to mine that rock!


Let's give this dwarf some ENERGY!




Coffee

You pour your hot Coffee into Sleepy's mouth. He wakes up and starts shaking! He leaps towards the rock and starts mining like crazy. He mines some nice diamonds before he collapses and falls asleep once more.

You sell the diamonds for 29 Rupees later on.

Continue




Eat It!

You dig in and eat all the regurgitated corn from your brother's body. Damn, that's some nice vomit! Your dad is an awesome cook! Actually, he is a... coo cook! Haha, no, that was terrible. Anyway, you feel a lot stronger now!

Continue
You gain 2 karma.




Forest Pigeon

You have matured into a Forest Pigeon. It's mating season and you're looking for a mate. Apparently you're a heterosexual, male pigeon. Do not question the game!

You encounter a sexy piece of feathery ass! Coo la la! What do you do?
Vomit
Puff feathers!
Bob head!
Fly around!




They See Me Bobbin'

You bob your head like there's something wrong with you. Your lady, however, seems intrigued! Such bobbing... what a gentleman you must be! She falls for your awesome charms and gives up her virginity for you, the sexy stranger. Yeah baby! You got some hot pigeon tail!

Continue
You gain 2 karma, so now you have 4 karma.



The Knights Who Say Ni

You walk through dark woods, when you hear ominous sounds around you. Oh no...

'Halt! We are the Knights who say... Ni! We have received a lot of shrubberies today and we are pleased. For this reason we shall teach you the power of the sacred words.'

item

Awww yeah, you've just gained the power of Ni!

Ni!




Crack Blown Up

You take a good look at the crack and carefully place your TNT near it. After a few seconds you blow a huge hole in the wall!

When you walk through the hole you find a shortcut and move forward 28 spaces!
Continue




Ice

You use your Pyroblast on the ice and it melts immediately!

When the fire dies out you find a piece of rope!

item



You've Been Spotted!

You start eating the cadaver, but are soon spotted by a lion. You have to move out of his way and wait your turn. Unfortunately, there isn't much meat left when he's done with it. You're still hungry...

Continue
You gain 1 karma, so now you have 2 karma.




Flee

Simba is back? And all the lionesses support him? You are OUTTA HERE! Fuck those lions and their political games! You're going back to your den and you're taking your clan with you.

Continue
You gain 2 karma, so now you have 4 karma.



Flava O' Da Jungle

[Image]

You walk through the Jungle and see a food stand.

'Welcome to Flava O' Da Jungle! D'Sean gonna serve you up today, mon?'

'Due to da Hungry Games, I be all outta Bananas and Watermelons. I be sorry, sista.'






Firetruck!!

You yank yourself free from the leash and run after the firetruck. Your owner runs after you yelling for you to stop. After a few blocks you come to your senses and your owner puts you back on the leash. You feel kinda good about yourself though.
Continue

You gain 2 karma, so now you have 5 karma.

[sineG yuG lareneG]

Yohoho!

You sail along with the pirates for 11 spaces but get raped numerous times.
You're also infected with Herpes now...
Continue


Watermelon

You let your Watermelon slip out of your bag and try to get away from the bear!

The bear stops and sniffs at the Watermelon. You don't wait around to see what happens and run 3 spaces forward.

Continue
->You Got Away



The Minus One Speed

Saruman shackles your spirit. You feel... slower...

'The progress of man is tiresome. You do not achieve greatness. You never will.'

Continue



Egg

So, you're inside your egg and you're totally bored with it! Gah, it's been 8 days already! Let's get a move on already!
Hatch!
Stay inside...



Grow, Little Bird

Then again, you feel a little underdeveloped and weak. You should take the time to sleep and grow. Hmmmm, sleeping ain't too bad...

Continue
You gain 2 karma.



Stuffin' The Muffin

You bombard the half-eaten muffin with your pigeon shit and laugh over its misery. It takes you a full 10 seconds to realise that muffins are generally not alive, and actually very tasty. You've just ruined a perfectly good meal and wasted an opportunity to poop on a human. Damn...

Continue
You gain 1 karma, so now you have 3 karma.


A Car

You're sitting on the road, trying to eat some bread you found. A car is approaching. What do you do?
FLY AWAY!
Wait for the last moment to fly away.
Don't fly away.




Wait For It!

You eat while the car approaches. You wait, you wait... and right before the car hits you, you fly away. This pisses off the driver immensely, because he was already slowing down and trying to make an evasive movement. Well done, you've pissed off a human!

Continue
You gain 2 karma, so now you have 5 karma.



Piano

You try to play a nice tune on your piano but it fails miserably...

Run!





Explosive sheep

You push your sheep towards the bear...

The sheep hops merrily towards the bear. The bear looks greedy and is willing to take a bite but then...

BOOOOOOM!
Continue




Annihilated bear

You look at the mutilated remains of the bear... Was that really necessary?

PETA found you and is planning actions against you...

Continue



Steal From Yourself

You unleash the card's magic upon yourself!

Nothing happens, and you still have 116 Rupees.

Continue




Subterranean Stream

You walk up to a subterranean stream. You let your hand slide through the cold, crystal clear water.
Douse the damn fire!
Leave




Dousing The Flames

You jump into the icy water. Luckily you were so hot that the cold relaxes your body. You climb out of the water and feel a lot better.
Continue




The Dragon's Hoard

You sneak up to the dragon's hoard. The dragon doesn't seem to notice you and you quickly stuff your bag with the loot. You take 17 Rupees and a Magic Crystal.

item

Awesome! You quickly make your way out of the cavern before the dragon notices her hoard is gone.
Continue


The Secret Of Fire

You use your Torch on some logs and they catch on fire! King Louie is really pleased with you because you gave him fire! He hands you some royal gifts.

itemitemitem
Continue
Banana Lemon Happycrystal



Holy Hand Grenade!

You throw your hand grenade at the bear.

The bear looks at it for a second, and then it explodes...

Continue



Traveling Salesman: Brews

[Image]
In the distance you see a traveling salesman! You walk up to a mad alchemist wearing green goggles. He hardly seems to notice you.

'Hmm, vat do you vant, Mädchen?'
AlrightNo thanks



Heinrich's Elixiere Und Andere Flüssigkeiten

'Meine Elixiere are ze most refined you vill ever find. It is quite ze honor to meet me, I'm sure.'
Potion Poison
item 2 Rupees item 3 Rupees
Buy Buy
Truth Serum Liquid Luck
item 4 Rupees item 5 Rupees
Buy Buy
Coffee Flask of Mojo
item 6 Rupees item 7 Rupees
Buy Buy
Free Drink Holy Water
item 7 Rupees item 8 Rupees
Buy Buy
Volatile Oil
item 9 Rupees
Buy

No thanks.


Heinrich waves his hand at a mysterious Potion.
'I forgot to label zat. Zat is why it is so cheap.'

'Yes yes... are you done yet? I haff vork to do.'


Heinrich waves his hand at a flask of Poison.
'One of my veaker poisons. I do not need it.'

'Yes yes... are you done yet? I haff vork to do.'


Heinrich waves his hand at a vial of Truth Serum.
'Ahh, yes! Ze Gestapo often order zese. I do not care for zem, but zey pay vell.'


Heinrich waves his hand at a vial of Liquid Luck.
'I could make zis better, but ze ingredients are rare.'


Heinrich waves his hand at a cup of Coffee.
'Ein meisterbrew! I like to drink it strong!'


Heinrich waves his hand at a Flask of Mojo.
'Here, I do not need zis. Ze ladies love me. I make ze best perfumes for zem!'



No Thanks

'Hmmm... yes, yes... Was? You vant nozzing? Zen how about you leave me im Ruhe?'

Continue


Bashful

You bump into Bashful. He immediately turns away his head and blushes. You... are not quite sure what to do.
Just leave

Let's give this dwarf some confidence already!
Flask of Mojo



Mojo, Baby!

You hand Bashful your Flask of Mojo. He turns completely red, but drinks it. He then explodes in a puff of red smoke!

When the smoke clears, Bashful walks up to you and says with a deep, sensual voice:

'Thanks, baby. I haven't felt this confident in my entire life. Here, let me reward you by casting this spell on you from this Light Scroll I dug up last year. And after that I'm gonna find me some ladies! Awwwww yeah!'

Bashful casts a spell on you and you gain 2 speed!
Continue



U.N. Motion

The United Nations propose a motion! All players get to vote [Yay] or [Nay]. If at least 50% of the players vote in favor, the motion will pass.

Today's motion is:
Players with more than 8 items and skills should lose 1 Speed.

Continue

Players have 1 minute to cast their vote. Players who do not vote, abstain.



U.N. Voting Results
1 in favor and 0 against.
The U.N. motion 'Players with more than 8 items and skills should lose 1 Speed' has been carried.

Recette loses 1 Speed.


Players with fewer than 8 characters in their name should lose 21 Rupees.




U.N. Voting Results
0 in favor and 1 against.
The U.N. motion 'Players with less than 8 characters in their name should lose 21 Rupees' has been rejected.




Narrow Passage

You wiggle your way into the narrow passage, but suddenly find yourself stuck. You try to go back, but that's not working either!

After a long time you try again and manage to work your way back out. You drop unconscious of fatigue.
Continue




Happy

There's Happy! He is one hell of a happy Dwarf! Hi Happy!

'Why hello there! Woohoohoohooooo! Would you like to hear a good joke?'
Yes please!Fuck off, Happy!




No Joke

You tell Happy to go fuck himself. Hahaha, that look on his face when you said that was soooo much funnier than any of his jokes!

Continue




Traveling Salesman: Diss Cards

[Image]
In the distance you see a traveling salesman! You walk up to an extravagantly dressed man. His cart is... colorful.

'Welcome, missy. Looking for power that defies all logic? Of course you are...'
YesNo




Willy Futterwacken's Traveling Diss Card Emporium

'Diss Cards are amazingly meta and can break down any fourth wall! If you want to win this board game, then step right up and pick a card... for a price!'
Diss Card: Knockback Diss Card: Steal Monies
item 7 Rupees item 10 Rupees
Buy Buy
Diss Card: Ensnare Diss Card: Death
item 15 Rupees item 20 Rupees
Buy out of
stock
Diss Card: Shift
item 1500 Rupees
Buy

No thanks.



Willy hands you a Diss Card: Knockback.
'Knock knock, who's there? It's a Diss Card: Knockback!'

'More cards to fill up your deck, missy?'



Willy hands you a Diss Card: Steal Monies.
'Want to buy more stuff? Use this Diss Card to 'borrow' some Rupees!'



Willy hands you a Diss Card: Ensnare.
'Is life going too fast for you? Use this Diss Card and slow things down a bit.'



No Thanks

'Alright, missy. Good luck winning this crazy board game!'

Continue



Sisterly Murder

Look at that little bitch, always being happy and nice! You wait for mother to leave the den and walk up to your sleeping sister. 'See you in hell, bitch!'

When mother returns to the den she finds you, covered in your sister's blood. She gives you a proud smile and lies down to give you milk. A victory meal to celebrate your first kill!

Continue
You gain 2 karma, so now you have 2 karma.



Three Hyenas

You sit around a bit with two other hyenas called Banzai and Ed. Ed is rolling around and just can't stop laughing... as usual. Banzai seems intent to annoy you.

'Mufasa, Mufasa, Mufasa!'

How do you respond?
Attack Banzai
Shiver in fear and laugh
Maul Ed




Mufasa Mufasa Mufasa

Mufasa! The name alone makes you shives and giggle! 'Mufasamufasamufasa!' Oh man, you can't stop laughing nervously! You roll over the floor and feel cramps in your belly! Oh man, Mufasa is way too mighty and scary! Heeheeheehee! Aww yeah, this is just what a hyena should be doing! Awesome!

Continue
You gain 2 karma, so now you have 4 karma.



The Bright Side Of Life

Always look on the bright side of life! All living players receive 10 Rupees!

Continue

[sineG yuG lareneG]

Treasure

You walk through the Cave and see something shining in the distance. When you walk closer you see a Sword and 7 Rupees in a treasure chest!

item

Wow, that's some nice treasure! You put it all in your bag and leave the Cave.
Continue



Burka Durk

You walk around, happily humming and suddenly find yourself in a terrorist hideout! A large group of masked terrorists stop talking and stare at you.

Then they start to shout and gesture to each other to attack you! You're intimidated and wonder for a moment what you should say...
Burka Durka Durka!



Burka Durka Durka!

'Burka Durka Durka!' you say!

The terrorists all stop talking and they seem unsure what to respond to that. Then they all cheer and shout and you have a beer with them. Guess they weren't all that bad...
Continue



Dead Fish

You spot a washed up Fish. It smells quite bad, but it might be tasty...

item

Continue
>Beach



Baloo

Baloo comes dancing through the jungle!

'Look for the bare necessities, the simple bare necessities...'

What do you do?
Dance along!Give him a back rub



Dance With Baloo

You swing to the jungle rhythm with Baloo! You move 2 spaces forward while moving to the groovy beat!

Continue




Joke

'Okidoki! Here's one for you!'

'Why was the math textbook so sad?

He had a lot of problems!'

Wow. Thanks, Happy. What a good joke.
Continue



Baratheon

You become a Baratheon! The royal Baratheons can be furious when provoked! You receive a Hammer, a War Helmet, a Dark Scroll: Mark For Death and a Ring of Light! In addition, you gain 2 speed while you're drunk.

itemitemitemitem

Let's visit Storm's End!

Continue



Storm's End

You enter the safe stronghold of the Baratheons: Storm's End. There's an entrance to a cave and you see some food in the kitchen. You also see a tunnel entrance leading away from the castle.

Click where you want to go.




Pick a random option



Escape Tunnel

You enter the Escape Tunnel, which leads you away from the castle and into the Stormlands. You move 7 spaces forward.

Continue




Pocket Ball, GO!

You throw your Pocket Ball at King Louie. It sucks him in and it keeps wiggling! After a few seconds it stops moving.

Success!


Recette Baratheon Lemongrass used her Pocket Ball to send King Louie after herself. Recette Baratheon Lemongrass partied with King Louie and has to skip a turn.




Joke

'Okidoki! Here's one for you!'

'Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.'

Wow. Thanks, Happy. What a good joke.
Continue



The Bright Side Of Death

Always look on the bright side of death! All dead players receive 10 Rupees!

Continue




Fail

You throw your Pocket Ball at Baloo. Baloo knocks it away before it can suck him in, and he's not happy! He chases you back 8 spaces before he dances off again...

Continue




Fish

You throw away your Fish and try to get away from the bear!

The bear stops to eat the Fish and really seems to like it! You run 2 spaces forward.
Continue


You got away

You fled from the Bear, and managed to save your sorry ass...

Continue



Doc

Doc is inspecting his diamonds. He seems to throw away the other crystals!

'Well, hello there! My, you're a tall one! Interested in trading one of your curious items for one of my Crystals?'
Continue

Trade an item with Doc:



Leave

You decide to leave. You're not interested in a trade right now.
Continue



Baboons

You follow the tracks and find a troop of baboons! They seem to be in the mood for some dancing! What do you do?

Dance!

Give those baboons your Banana!




Banana Dance

You give the Baboons your Banana and swing to the jungle rhythm! Yeah, baby! Shake that ass!

The baboons go crazy with your Banana and start doing the Banana Dance! Woah! These funky monkeys are going ape!

You swing 24 spaces forward!

Continue



Ours Is The Fury

You enter an inn and get drunk like a true Baratheon! Unfortunately, also like a true Baratheon, you smash some of the inn's furniture. The innkeeper charges you 3 Rupees for the damage.

Damn your uncontrollable fury...

Continue


Crabs

You walk along the beach line, and notice some crabs. Awww, they seem pretty cool. When you walk on you slowly get the feeling you just got infected with Crabs.

Crap.

Continue




No.

William Dalton opens fire and shoots all his bullets at you. You lift up your head and look at the bullets.

'No.' you say.

The bullets hang still in mid-air for a moment.
Then, seemingly having lost all momentum, drop to the floor.
Continue




The Duel Continues...

You walk up to William Dalton.
'So it's come to this...' you say.

What now?
No idea. Let him beat me up.

Use an item or skill against him:
Grenade, Disscard: Death



WACKA WACKA

You look William Dalton in the eyes and rub your belly.

'Imma eat you!'

William Dalton gives you a strange look. You eat William Dalton... and you're STILL hungry! Tastes like beef...

You receive a 10 Rupee reward for your heroic deed!
Also, your reputation in the Wild West has improved!
Continue


Jim Younger

You've drawn the attention of one of the more famous villains.
Killing this guy will do your reputation good!
Jim Younger stands still in the distance.

'Draw your weapon, do-gooder!'
Nope.

Use an item or skill against him:




Fart

You fart the The Mysterious Ticking Noise by Potter Puppet Pals. That's freaking awesome! Move 14 spaces forward!
Continue



No Love Potion

'Bad experiences with potions, perhaps?'
Continue


Bucket

You suddenly come across a Bucket.

item

It's a bit rusty, but it might come in handy...
Continue


Prehistory

[Image]
Seems like you've been hurled back in time like crazy! Let's explore!
Continue

Let's look for something improbable:



Tyrannosaurus Rex

A Tyrannosaurus Rex eats you. OM NOM NOM NOM!
Continue

P.S. Yes. You are dead.




Pocket Ball, GO!

Your return from the dead may have been a bit premature. You find yourself in a dinosaur's intestines. You crawl around until you find a way out. Tickling his inner anus, you cause the T-Rex to poop you out! You're an awesome adventurer, that's what you are!

Payback time! You grab your Pocket Ball and throw it at the gigantic carnivore! GET... IN... MY... BALL!

The Tyrannosaurus turns a bright yellow, much more slowly than the other creatures you've caught. It screeches loudly and waves its tail around with incredible force. Nevertheless, it gets sucked into your tiny ball. It starts jumping around like crazy!

You wait. And wait. And wait some more...

After a good five minutes the Pocket Ball stops moving. Well, Rexxy may be big and strong, but he sure ain't smart enough to escape from your awesome ball!

Success!



Your Pocket Ball contains the Tyranosaurus Rex. Woah, nice job! Are you sure you want to release a freaking T-Rex though? On the other hand... Unleash it to bring death and destruction to all! Muahahahaha!



Recette Baratheon Lemongrass caught the Tyrannosaurus Rex with her Pocket Ball!
Recette Baratheon Lemongrass released the Tyrannosaurus Rex from her Pocket Ball! Oh no!
Recette Baratheon Lemongrass was killed by the T-Rex!


Round 163
Effects

The T-Rex is still running rampage!
Continue


Round 165
Effects

Necromancer Merchant Recette Baratheon Lemongrass was killed by the T-Rex! Maybe you shouldn't have captured this mighty beast?
Continue


Round 168
Effects

Necromancer Merchant Recette Baratheon Lemongrass ran 9 spaces back to escape from the T-Rex!
Continue


Round 169
Effects

The army captured the T-Rex! Maybe you can visit him in a zoo in the future?
Continue



The Secret Of Fire

You use your Flamethrower to shoot a small flame at some logs and they catch on fire! King Louie is really pleased with you because you gave him fire! He hands you some royal gifts.

itemitemitem
Continue



Jazzy Lullabies

You sit down behind your piano. How you manage to keep dragging that thing along, nobody knows, but you start playing some jazzy lullabies. The dragon seems intrigued and listens intensely. After a few minutes her eyes closing and the mighty beast falls asleep.
Continue


Sleeping Dragon

The dragon sleeps in front of you.



What do you do?
Flee
Tell a story

Use an item:



Humanslayer

Dragons in caves are there to be slain! You take up your Sword and lunge yourself at the sleeping dragon! You have a clear advantage now that she is still asleep!

You use your Shield to fend off the dragon as best you can! You strike her neck with your Sword as hard as you can! You slice her mighty, scaled belly! Finally, you strike her with a mighty blow to the head! Your Sword breaks, but the dragon is not yet slain! She roars in pain and eats you alive!

Ouch...
Continue




Batman Gadget

You walk into the Batcave, but Batman seems to be out. You grab one of his gadgets and quickly leave before he gets back!

item

Continue



Diss Card: Death

You use your Diss Card: Death on the bear.

The bear dies.

Continue


Dead bear

You take a quick glance at the cadaver and quickly run away...
However, someone took pictures of your cowardly act and now PETA is onto you!

Continue



Masturbation!

You start playing with yourself. It's only slightly disturbing.
Continue
>Goblin Potion Master


Crack

You leave the crack and continue your way through the Cave. A short while later you find the exit!
Continue



Pocket Ball, GO!

You throw your Pocket Ball at Baloo. It sucks him in and it keeps wiggling! After a few seconds it stops moving.

Success!



Recette Baratheon Lemongrass used her Pocket Ball to send Baloo after herself. Baloo gave Recette Baratheon Lemongrass a Lemon.



Relaxing Stare

You put on your Hypno Glasses and stare the dragon in the eyes. Though furious, she seems to be unable to look away from you. Slowly, she stops breathing fire and calms down. She may be too strong to be hypnotized, but you sure seem to have put her off-guard!
Continue



Fire Breath

You quietly walk up to the dragon's nest. However, the dragon notices you and becomes enraged! The dragon takes a deep breath... and sprays fire all across the cavern! You barely manage to escape, but are on fire now. Ouch!
Continue



Bats!

A swarm of bats scares you out of the Cave. You run back 7 spaces!
Continue



Pocket Ball, GO!

You throw your Pocket Ball at the Bats, and some of them get sucked into it! Nice catch!

Success!



Ice

You walk through the Cave when notice something frozen inside a big ice formation. This could be something really old. Maybe even from the prehistory!

If only you could melt the ice...
Leave the Cave

Use an item to melt the ice:




Ice

You use your Pyroblast on the ice and it melts immediately!

When the fire dies out you find a Dark Scroll: Blind!

item

Awesome!




Jump In The Tub

You jump into the watertub!
You feel the cold water rushing around you, but then you slip and land on your back!

Suddenly you gulp water instead of air, and deep inside you know you are going to drown...

After a few moments it's over, and you're dead... again...
Continue



Falling Pig

[Image]
A pig falls on your head, but luckily you wear a cool helmet! This seems to be standard equipment for Baratheons these days! Mmmmm, bacon!
Continue




Batmobile

You enter the Batcave and see the Batmobile. Suddenly Batman comes running in and jumps into his car! He didn't even notice you!
You quickly climb on top of it and hold on as best you can. You ride with the Batmobile for 11 spaces before you cannot hold on any longer and fall off.

Awesome!
Continue



The Hungry Games

[Image]
A loud voice suddenly booms from loudspeakers all around you...

'Welcome, citizens, to the annual Hungry Games! You have each been selected as a tribute. Compete by eating food and killing your opponents. And as always...'

'MAY THE FOODS BE EVER IN YOUR FAVOR!'

Let the games begin!





Frostbolt!

You hurl an icy frostbolt at the bear and quickly run away!

The bear is unable to move and you make a run for it...
Continue



Jungle Beast

You try to climb a tree but the monster grabs you before you're high enough. He kills you and runs off.

Continue




Let's Sleep In

Then again, you feel like taking a little nap. Just a few more days. Yawn...

A few days later you hatch, almost starved to death. Your brothers and sisters hatched days ago and have outgrown you. Damn...

Continue
You gain 1 karma.



Seeds

You're a stinky pigeon and you're hungry. Luckily you see a lady throwing seeds on the ground. Instantly hundreds of pigeons fly towards them. This is your cue! What do you do?

MY SEEDS! Fly mindlessly towards them!
Wait your turn...
Attack the other pigeons
Poop on the lady's head




Poop Time!

You don't care that this lady is sharing food with your kind. Humans should be pooped on! You fly over her and poop right in the old lady's face! Awww yeah, that was some good poopin'! The old lady stumbles and falls over. The bag of seeds falls on the ground and reveals a big pile of seeds. You quickly eat as much as you can! Awww yeah! Of course pooping was the best move!

Continue
You gain 2 karma, so now you have 3 karma.




Fly Away

You fly away. The car crushes your food, making it unedible, even for a flying rat like yourself. Awww damn... you should've paid attention on pigeon school. Pigeons ALWAYS wait for the last moment to fly away.

Continue
You gain 1 karma, so now you have 4 karma.





Joke

'Okidoki! Here's one for you!'

'Why do men always want to be on the bottom during sex?

Because all they know is how to fuck up.'

Wow. Thanks, Happy. What a good joke.
Continue




Leave

'You don't look well, maybe you should take a nap.' says the tough bald guy while he works you out of the door.
Continue



Recette Baratheon Lemongrass sued Adobe over patent rights and gained 5 Rupees.



Tasty Cow

You offer the angry dragon your Cow. She breathes flames from her nostrils as she sniffs the animal. She then devours it in one big gulp!

The dragon is pleased and calms down a little.
Continue




Story Time

You approach the dragon and begin talking...

You talk about the news you read in the newspaper today. People shooting toddlers in the USA. Rebels trying to get rid of Dictators in the Middle East. You conclude with some of the latest glossy gossip.

The dragon is kind of bored with your lame story. She nods and yawns and looks around a bit. After a while you just decide to leave. No success!
Continue




Story Time

You approach the dragon and begin talking...

You tell the story of How To Tame Your Dragon. You decide to emphasize the awesomeness of the dragons and provide homemade sound effects. Damn, all that AND a happy ending!

The dragon looks enthusiastic! You told a great story, apparently!
Continue



Blind

You unleash your Dark Scroll's blinding magic upon the bear!

The bear roars and runs blindly towards a tree... WHAM!

Continue


You got away

You fled from the Bear, and managed to save your sorry ass...

Continue




Story Time

You approach the dragon and begin talking...

You tell the story of Beowulf the dragon slayer! A dragon got angry because someone had stolen a cup from its hoard and Beowulf was called upon to slay the evil beast. You act out the dragon slaying scene with precision and elegance. Nailed it!

The dragon blows smoke from her nostrils. She seems infuriated by your story! Oh shit... this would be a good time to start running!
Continue



Escape

The angry dragon roars and swipes her huge claws at you! You use your Shield to fend off the angry dragon as best you can! You manage to avoid her impaling attacks and run for your life!
Continue



Flamethrower

You power up your Flamethrower and shoot at the Bear! The flames hit the Bear and he shrieks in agony!

Continue



Bear On Fire

The bear roars in agony and blindly runs towards you! One of his claws hits you in the chest and you slowly bleed to death...
The bear is beyond saving and dies a few moments later...
Continue




Frosty Bear

You send your Blue Dragonling after the Bear!

The bear is slowed down and you run forward 8 spaces to get away...

Continue
>You got away



Pocket Ball, GO!

You throw your Pocket Ball at King Louie. It sucks him in and it keeps wiggling! After a few seconds it stops moving.

Success!



Storm's End

You enter the safe stronghold of the Baratheons: Storm's End. There's an entrance to a cave and you see some food in the kitchen. You also see a tunnel entrance leading away from the castle.

Click where you want to go.




Pick a random option



The Cave

You walk into the Cave and it slowly gets darker...

Continue



A Bomb!

You walk into a hideout of terrorists. One of them spots you and cackles maniacally! He lights a bomb and throws it to you!

Oh no oh no oh no!
Waaaah!



Boom!

The bomb explodes in your hands. Go back 10 spaces!
Continue


s2.boardgame-online.com/g/images/event/47.png



Billy The Kid

Your fame has spread wide and far!
The crown on your career as law enforcer of the Wild West!
Billy The Kid stands still in the distance.

'Draw your weapon, do-gooder!'
Nope.

Use an item or skill against him:




You Got Away

You run like hell and leave the Jungle. You lost the beast and you're glad to be alive...

Continue



Crushed!

You quietly walk up to the dragon's hoard. However, the dragon notices you and becomes enraged! The dragon swipes her huge claws at you! You are crushed by her mighty paws and die.
Continue



Hypno Hero!

You put on your Hypno Glasses and stare Jesse James in the eyes.
'Shoot yourself.'

Jesse James shoots himself and drops dead.

You receive a 50 Rupee reward for your heroic deed!
You are now the hero of the Wild West!
Continue



Pyroblast!

You hurl a deadly pyroblast at the bear!

The bear is toasted...
Continue
>Annihilated bear



Picard Facepalm

You find yourself aboard the Starship Enterprise. You notice captain Picard, have a nerdgasm, try to look cool and accidentally fire a photon torpedo at Earth.
[Image]
You use Picard's facepalm to your best advantage, swipe a Phaser and quickly run away!

item
Continue


s2.boardgame-online.com/g/images/event/picard_facepalm.jpg



Spicy Dinner

You give the angry dragon your Explosive Sheep. She roars and devours it in one big gulp. She blows smoke at you for a few seconds when...

KABOOM!

The Sheep explodes in her stomach! The dragon roars in pain!

Uh oh... The dragon swipes her mighty claws at you and crushes every bone in your body. You die.
Continue




Stormtroopers

Oh no, you've been cornered by at least 50 Stormtroopers! They're everywhere! They open fire and it rains down laser shots from everywhere you look.

One Stormtrooper shoots at a reflective plate and hits himself in the face.

Another Stormtrooper didn't hold his gun right and shoots himself in the face.

You look around and start counting objects that are hit around you. You lose track at 42.

You shrug and walk off. Lasers keep passing you narrowly as you leave the Stormtroopers behind. Damn, those guys cannot aim for shit!
Continue


Mining Pick

You throw your Mining Pick at the bear.

The Mining Pick hits the bear on his head!
Continue
>Enraged Bear


s2.boardgame-online.com/g/images/event/bear_enraged.jpg



Crystal Formation

You almost cut yourself on a Crystal Formation. If only you had a Mining Pick...
Leave the Cave



U.N. Voting Results
0 in favor and 1 against.
The U.N. motion 'Players with more than 7 items and skills should lose 25 Rupees' has been rejected.



Banana Fish

You throw away your Banana Fish and try to get away from the bear!

The bear stops to eat the Banana Fish and really seems to like it! You run 7 spaces forward.
Continue


Hero!

Welcome, miss! It's such an honor to have you here! Please, take anything you need!

itemitemitemitemitemitem

God bless you!



Dopey

Dopey sits in a corner and appears to be looking at his hand, which he is slowly moving around. Damn, that dwarf is way out there!

item

You take some of his Weed and walk away. Dopey doesn't notice a thing.

Continue


Traveling Salesman: Weapons

[Image]
In the distance you see a traveling salesman! You walk up to a rough looking Russian man. His van is full of weapons!

'I sell weapons. You need, comrade.'
YesNo



Ivan's Weapons Van

'Look at van. Full of weapons. You buy I give you good price.'
Gun Hand Grenade
item 5 Rupees item 10 Rupees
out of
stock out of
stock
Combustible Lemon Flamethrower
item 10 Rupees item 12 Rupees
Buy Buy
Bow & Arrows Phaser
item 12 Rupees item 19 Rupees
out of
stock Buy
Lightsaber Sword
item 20 Rupees item 20 Rupees
Buy Buy

No thanks.



Ivan pushes Phaser in your hands.
'Is secret Russian technology. Kill settink is best settink.'

'I haff more, comrade.'


Ivan pushes Combustible Lemon in your hands.
'Good for burnink. Is strange design, but I don't ask question.'




Ivan pushes Flamethrower in your hands.
'Capitalists love burnink. Aimink is very easy after few bottles of vodka.'




Ivan pushes Lightsaber in your hands.
'Top secret Russian technology, comrade! Also good for stayink warm in snow.'




Ivan pushes Sword in your hands.
'Very good for close combat. You kill capitalist dead. Is easy.'




No Thanks

'Haff nice day, comrade!'

Continue



Traveling Salesman: Brews

[Image]
In the distance you see a traveling salesman! You walk up to a mad alchemist wearing green goggles. He hardly seems to notice you.

'Yes, yes, all ze potions on ze counter are for sale. Do not waste mein time und pick vat you vant!'
AlrightNo thanks



Heinrich waves his hand at a Free Drink.
'Do not drink zat, Mädchen!'


Heinrich waves his hand at a bottle of Volatile Oil.
'I am proud of zis oil. She burns viss a fury!'



Relaxing Tunes

You sit down behind your piano. How you manage to keep dragging that thing along, nobody knows, but you start playing some relaxing tunes. The dragon seems intrigued and listens intensely. The music calms her down considerably.
Continue



Story Time

You approach the dragon and begin talking...

You begin to tell some stories of when you were young. Not that you aren't still young, of course! You give it your very best and laugh at your own adventures. Man, this is good stuff!

The dragon is kind of bored with your lame story. She nods and yawns and looks around a bit. After a while you just decide to leave. No success!
Continue



Saruman the Grey? Let's use your Improbability Device on him!



Improbability Device

You use your Improbability Device on Saruman! Saruman the Grey suddenly fades away and becomes...
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March Forth, Uruk-hai!

Saruman orders his army of elite Uruk-hai to drag you back 21 spaces.

'March forth, Uruk-hai! Get this mortal out of my sight!'

Continue


The Secret Of Fire

You toss your Combustible Lemon at a pile of wood. The explosion causes it to turn into a big bonfire! King Louie is really pleased with you because you gave him fire! He hands you some royal gifts.

>Oil also works



Grumpy

Oh fuck, it's Grumpy!

'What the... You have SOME NERVE! This Cave is private property! I am gonna blow your fucking head off, you filthy piece of shit!'

You run out of the Cave and move back 9 spaces.
Continue


The Secret Of Fire

You pour a few drops of your Volatile Oil over some logs and they catch on fire! King Louie is really pleased with you because you gave him fire! He hands you some royal gifts.

[sineG yuG lareneG]

Needs More Cake!

You find yourself aboard the Starship Enterprise. Apparently it's captain Picard's birthday and there's plenty of cake. Still he doesn't seem happy...
[Image]
You snatch a Delicious Cake and a Phaser and quickly run away!

itemitem
s2.boardgame-online.com/g/images/event/picard_cake.jpg

[sineG yuG lareneG]

Hello, Little Girl

Yes! That little girl will do just fine! She may be small, but she's a slow-moving target. You can do this! You swoop down from the sky and drop poop right on her face. The girl looks startled for a moment and then starts crying, causing the poop to run into her mouth.

Wow, that was a priceless poop! Well done!

Continue
You gain 2 karma, so now you have 4 karma.

[sineG yuG lareneG]

Entering The Cave

You walk into the mine and find yourself in an old cave. It's slowly getting darker and darker around you...

Continue



Inside The Cave

You stand inside the dark, dark cave. Ah shit, you can't see a damn thing...


Go in blindly.Try to get out!



Crack In The Wall

While walking through the Cave you feel a crack in the wall. You might be able to blow a hole if you have some explosives.
Leave the Cave

Use an explosive to blow a hole in the Cave:



Crack Blown Up

You take a good look at the crack and release your Explosive Sheep near it! After a few seconds you blow a hole in the wall!

When you walk through the hole you find a shortcut and move forward 9 spaces!
Continue



Entering The Cave

You walk into the mine and find yourself in an old cave. It's slowly getting darker and darker around you...
Then you notice a torch and some matches lying near the entrance. You light the Torch and take it with you.

item

Continue



Inside The Cave

You stand inside the dark cave. You are, however, totally on fire. Normally you'd consider this quite the annoyance, but the flames grant you nice vision in the cave. Sweet!


Go in blindly.Try to get out!

Hint: If you have vision, you can use your cursor to explore the Cave.



Dousing The Flames

You jump into the icy water. Luckily you were so hot that the cold relaxes your body. You climb out of the water and feel a lot better.

Unfortunately you now no longer have any vision in the dark. You try to look for the exit, but you keep walking in circles. Or so you assume.

You skip a turn.
Continue



Story Time

You approach the dragon and begin talking...

You tell the story of the great dragons of Westeros. You go into detail about how these mighty beasts from the Shadow Lands were both feared and admired.

The dragon looks enthusiastic! You told a great story, which is logical since you're a Targaryen!
Continue



Pleased Dragon

The dragon insists on giving you something before you leave. She pushes forward a tiny bag of Rupees and a Magic Crystal.

item

You count 6 Rupees in the tiny bag as you leave the Cave. Sweet!
Continue




WTF Is This Shit?!

You find yourself aboard the Starship Enterprise. You notice captain Picard, have a nerdgasm, try to look cool, touch some buttons and accidentally beam half the crew into space.
[Image]
You use the resulting chaos to your best advantage and sneak off with a Phaser!

item


s2.boardgame-online.com/g/images/event/picard_wtf.jpg



Mine Crystals

You swing your Mining Pick at the Crystal Formation!

You take some Crystal Meth and a Happy Crystal with you.

item item

Continue




Grand Disappearance

You use your Grand Disappearance and poof, you're gone!

The Bear looks around confused to where you went...
Continue

The Bear

The Bear walks off backward...
Continue



Fart

You fart 'Living In The Sunlight' by Tiny Tim. That's freaking awesome! Move 14 spaces forward!
Continue



Targaryen Fire

You are in the City over the Narrow Sea and feel like setting yourself on fire to prove you are a real Targaryen. When you feel the heat of the flames you realise it does hurt quite a lot. You run around screaming and yelling. The people in the city think this is quite funny and toss you some money.

You pick up 5 Rupees. Ouch though!

Continue



Dance With Baloo

You swing to the jungle rhythm with Baloo! You move 3 spaces forward while moving to the groovy beat!

Continue



Ho Dragon Ho!

You calm down the dragon with your soothing words about a world filled with mighty dragons. A paradise even! The angry dragon seems to like the story and calms down a bit...
Continue



Real Heroine

'You've proven yourself to be a real heroine! Grab yourself a drink and take one home!'
Continue



Disguised

You walk around, happily humming and suddenly find yourself in a terrorist hideout. A large group of sinister men stare at you.

They start to shout and run around! They grab their guns and start shooting you! How many spaces do you run backwards to avoid their bullets?

Choose
(Max 40 spaces)



You Got Hit!

You didn't run quite far enough and get shot up the pooper! The terrorists cheer and dance as you hop out of the Cave. You move back 13 spaces.
Continue



Assassinate

You use your stealthy assassin moves to run around the bear.

With two quick stabs the bear drops dead onto the ground.

Continue
>Dead bear



Mojo

You drank some Mojo... Hmmm, sexual!

Continue


Crazy Juice

Swoop da woop! You just drank some crazy juice! Schnitzel powerrrrr!




Aphrodisiac

It was an aphrodisiac. You are now so distracted you move 1 space slower each turn.
Hmmmmm, muscled, sexy men!



Volatile Oil

It was Volatile Oil! Your insides burn as you scream for help!

You die.



You cannot resist the urge to go inside...
Enter the brothel!



Dragonslayer

Dragons in caves are there to be slain! You take up your Sword and lunge yourself at the dragon!

You use your Shield to fend off the dragon as best you can! You strike her neck with your Sword as hard as you can! You slice her mighty, scaled belly! Finally, you strike her with a mighty blow to the head! Your Sword breaks and the dragon roars at you. She stumbles and... falls over. You have done it! You've slain the dragon!
Continue



Treasures!

You have earned a boon for slaying the dragon! Her hoard and her egg are yours! You claim 18 Rupees, a damaged Sword and a Magic Crystal. You also take her Green Egg with you!

itemitemitem
Sweet!
Continue


Sprint

You sprint away like never before!

The bear is not so quick.

Continue
>You got away



A dragon flies through the sky, looking for a cave to claim as her home...



Disguised

You walk around, happily humming and suddenly find yourself in a terrorist hideout. A large group of sinister men stare at you.

Luckily, you're wearing a Balaclava and they think you're one of them. You grab some stuff and leave quickly.

itemitemitem
grenade rocket oil




No AIDS Anymore!

Even doctors make mistakes. Lucky you!

Continue



Recette Lemongrass has won the Hungry Games and has earned 50 Rupees!
***The Hungry Games have ended!***


Piss

It was piss. You'll now be known as a piss drinker!
Continue



Sleepy

Sleepy was busy mining a big rock, but... he fell asleep. Hmmm, maybe that rocks contains diamonds!
Wake Sleepy
Leave

Time to mine that rock!



Mining

You grab your Mining Pick and swing at the rock. Oof, it's a pretty damn hard one! After a few hours you manage to collect a few diamond splinters. You manage to sell them for 5 Rupees.
Continue



Terrorists!

You walk around, happily humming and suddenly find yourself in a terrorist hideout! A large group of masked terrorists stop talking and stare at you for a moment.

You join the conversation since you're wearing a Balaclava and convince them of your best intentions...

Who do you want to send them after?
Send them after Tarzan!
I don't want to send them after anybody!

[sineG yuG lareneG]

Reference Time!

Everyone likes their own stuff. It's time for you to decide what this game's reference event will be about! Choose wisely, as this choice cannot be undone for the rest of this game!

This game will be about...
Game Of Thrones
Adventure Time

More reference events are being added over time. For example, there will be one for Doctor Who in November. So stay tuned!


Cooking With Jake

[Image]
You find yourself in Finn and Jake's kitchen! Jake is there and he seems terribly hungry!

'Ah, man! Lady keeps making me eat apples. She says they're healthy for me, but I'm sick of 'em. You seem cool. Do you have any food to share?'
Nope, sorry!

Cooking With Jake

[Image]
You find yourself in Finn and Jake's kitchen! Jake is there and he seems terribly hungry!

'Ah, man! Lady keeps making me eat apples. She says they're healthy for me, but I'm sick of 'em. You seem cool. Do you have any food to share?'
Nope, sorry!


Night Vision Goggles

You put your Night Vision Goggles in PB's hands. She barely seems to notice you!

'Ohhh, yes! This is full of parts I can use! It just takes a logical recombination of these various components to create a photon loop that will suffice just fine! Thanks for helping me out! Here, take these! You've earned them! Besides, I prefer science over magic anyway.'

itemitem

Wooh, candy!
orb candy cane



Ice King!

You're enjoying a nice walk through the beautiful frozen valleys of Ooo when suddenly Ice King comes down from the sky!

'What? An intruder in my domain? As if Finn and Jake aren't annoying enough! Witness the power of frost!'

Ice King freezes you in a giant cube of ice and you're unable to move! Damn, this is gonna render you incapacitated for a while...
Continue


Explore Ooo

You decide to explore Ooo some more. Who knows who or what you might find!

Continue


Marceline

Oh shit! You find yourself in front of Marceline the Vampire Queen! She's looking terribly scary!

'Ugh, I can't believe those apples I ordered were all green! Hey, you! I can sense... shades of red... in your blood. Come here! I'm only gonna drink a little bit...'

Shit man! You need your blood for living! Run away! Run awaaaay!
Continue

Give Marceline an item:



Vampires Are Scary

'So... Saboteur [CAL] #CAL, huh? Alright then! Watch this!'

Marceline turns into a horrible monstrosity and scares Saboteur [CAL] #CAL 21 spaces backwards! You thank Marceline and are on your merry way again.

Sweet!



Cooking With Jake

[Image]
You find yourself in Finn and Jake's kitchen! Jake is there and he seems terribly hungry!

'Ah, man! Lady keeps making me eat apples. She says they're healthy for me, but I'm sick of 'em. You seem cool. Do you have any food to share?'
Nope, sorry!





Cinnamon Bun

You meet a sweet smelling inhabitant of Ooo. He looks like a giant... cinnamon bun?

'Hey Finn! I was looking for Princess Bubblegum, but I got lost. I'm so happy to see you!'

Man, you could go for a tasty cinnamon bun right now. You decide to eat him. You feel great and move 10 spaces forwards!
ON NOM NOM!



Hand Grenade

You enter a hideout of terrorists. Luckily none of them seem to be around. You notice something green.

item

You steal a Hand Grenade and quickly leave the Cave!
Continue



Bacon Pancakes

'Woah, dude! You've got Bacon?! This. Is. So. Good. We're gonna make pancakes, buddy! Bacon Pancakes!'

Jake bursts into song as he grabs his equipment!

'Bacon pancakes! Making bacon pancakes! Take some bacon and I'll put it in a pancake! Bacon pancakes, that's what it's gonna make! Bacon pancaaaake!'

item

Jake hands you a stack of mouthwatering Bacon Pancakes. These are... so damn good!

Bacon Pancaaaaaakes!

[sineG yuG lareneG]

Slot Machine

item item item
You win 10 Rupees!
Continue
Green crystal thing


Banana

You hand Jake your Banana! Jake eagerly eats it!

'Dude! That's a lot better than apples! You're the best, man! Anything I can help you out with?'

Go forwards
Get Reflective Shades
Get a Book
No thanks!


Ice King!

You're enjoying a nice walk through the beautiful frozen valleys of Ooo when suddenly Ice King comes down from the sky!

'Oohh. Hee hee! Hello! I'm the Ice King and you... Oh my! You're a wizard yourself, aren't you? Here, have some of my freaky frost magic! Wanna hang out later? Hmm?'

Ice King conjures up a stack of Snowballs, just for you!

item

[sineG yuG lareneG]

Lumpy Space Princess

You walk through a forest and suddenly bump into Lumpy Space Princess. She seems to have been talking to herself.

'I wonder if Finn likes me. I know he can't get enough of my lumps, but boys can be so hard to understand!'

What do you tell her?

He likes you.
He hates you!
He thinks you look like a rubbery cloud.



Lumpy Space Princess

You walk through a forest and suddenly bump into Lumpy Space Princess. She seems to have been talking to herself.

'Oh, my Glob. I just just love your outfit. You look, like, so amazing! How would that look on my sexy body?'

What do you tell her?

You don't wear clothes.
You'd look, like, amazing!
You wouldn't fit them.


Lumping Insult

'Of course I don't wear clothes! When you look this hot you don't have to! There's no need to be so mean! Like, act like a lumping adult!'

LSP slaps you 3 spaces back!

Continue





The Dead Know No Fear

'So... Barbarian Dangertyde, huh? Alright then! Watch this!'

Marceline turns into a horrible monstrosity and tries to scare Barbarian Dangertyde, but Barbarian Dangertyde is dead!

'Okay, I'm not gonna scare a corpse. It's no use!'

Continue

[sineG yuG lareneG]

Mining

You grab your Mining Pick and swing at the rock. Oof, it's a pretty damn hard one! After a few hours you manage to collect a few diamond splinters. You manage to sell them for 4 Rupees.
Continue



Lumpy Space Princess

You walk through a forest and suddenly bump into Lumpy Space Princess. She seems to have been talking to herself.

'Hey there. I've been working on this amazing body! How do you think I look?'

What do you tell her?

Slender
Wobbly
Purple


Lumping Insult

'You're just jealous of my lumps! Just because you're smooth doesn't mean you have to insult my lumps!'

LSP slaps you 3 spaces back!

Continue




I Feel Good!

Damn, you feel good! You pick up the pace and move 10 spaces forwards!
Continue





Dungeon Entrance

You stand in front of the Dungeon of the Forgotten Dunes! Oh man, this is gonna be so awesome! You can already see your first opponent!

It appears to be some kind of skinny lizard guard. He doesn't seem too dangerous. Actually, he seems kinda weak.

So... what do you do?
Run past him!
Sneak past him...
Fight him with your bare hands!
Run away!

Use a weapon:



Hammer

You smack the slender guard in the head with your Hammer! Your Hammer breaks, but it was worth it! You leave the unconscious guard behind and enter the dungeon.

Continue




Monster Encounter




You find yourself facing an opponent! It's some kind of big mouth monster. It chomps wildly at the air surrounding it. What do you do?
Flee!

Hint: specific items and skills help you counter these various opponents. Always come prepared!

Hint: the Orb can be used to unleash magic if you have a magic crystal.




Run Awaaay!

You don't feel like fighting monsters today! You run away as fast as you can and jump into what you hope is an escape tunnel. You slide, bump and shoot out of the dungeon. Unfortunately you bump your head some many times that you pass out.

Oof...




Watermelon

You quickly reach for your Watermelon! Marceline instantly seems calm again.

'Hey... something red. For me? You know... sorry. We got off on the wrong foot. You're actually kinda cool! I'm still in the mood to scare the living daylight out of someone, though! Do you know anyone?'


No, sorry!



No Thanks

'No one, huh? Well, I'm gonna scare Finn and Jake then! I'm gonna mess with their sanity! Hahahaha!'

Continue




It appears to be some kind of lizard guard. That guy is taking a nap. Not the best guard, really.




Sneaky

You quietly sneak past the sleeping lizard guard. Luckily the he's in a deep sleep and you can easily get to the entrance.

You wonder what dangers this place is gonna hold... and treasures...

Continue




Sphinx

[Image]http://s2.boardgame-online.com/g/images/event/at_sphinx1.jpg
You find yourself in a crystal room with a purring sphinx.

'Hey there, nice person! Welcome to my room! MEOW! Hee hee, you know the deal! Answer my question and you're free to go. Else I'm gonna have to eat you, sorry. Mew! :3'

Oookay?



Correct

'Well done, adventurerrrr... You can continue now, but I will miss having someone to... play with. Prrrrrr... Do come back later, okay?'

Continue




Continue?

You've just overcome challenge number 1 of this dungeon crawl. If you manage to beat all 3 challenges, you can claim epic loot. However, each challenge becomes more dangerous. So... do you wish to continue or will you settle for whatever loot you can find here?

Go deeper into the Dungeon
Take loot and leave




Incoming Monster

[Image]http://s2.boardgame-online.com/g/images/event/at_incoming.jpg
Holy moly! A giant creature is coming your way! It's huge and probably evil and you're too young to be eaten! Your adventuring instincts tell you you need to get at least 8 spaces away from your current space, which is space 222, to escape it. Quickly now!

Continue



Safe And Sound

You manage to get 8 spaces away from your old location and successfully avoid a confrontation with that giant monster. You pat yourself on the back and continue.

Continue



Continue?

You've just overcome challenge number 2 of this dungeon crawl. If you manage to beat all 3 challenges, you can claim epic loot. However, each challenge becomes more dangerous. So... do you wish to continue or will you settle for whatever loot you can find here?

Go deeper into the Dungeon
Take loot and leave



Incoming Monster

[Image]
Holy moly! A giant creature is coming your way! It's huge and probably evil and you're too young to be eaten! Your adventuring instincts tell you you need to get at least 10 spaces away from your current space, which is space 230, to escape it. Quickly now!

Continue




OM NOM NOM

You try to find a place to hide, but the giant monster emerges from the darkness and devours you whole! It thinks you taste pretty good for an adventurer. Could have used more salt though.

Naturally, you die.

Continue




Monster Encounter




You find yourself facing an opponent! It's a... party bear? Wait. It's an evil party bear! This guy can definitely kill you, but his groovy nature might allow you to get past him... What do you do?
Flee!




Sex Bomb, Sex Bomb, You're A Sex Bomb!

You hand the evil party bear your Sex Bomb.

'A... Sex Bomb? I didn't even know those really existed! Oh man... I've got to use this baby at the Party Bear Sorority. All those rocking young chicks. Fuck yeah!'

The evil party bear runs off! You wish him well on his sexy adventure. You also wish yourself well on your adventure.

You carry on!

Continue




Banana

You throw your Banana at the hungry monster. It greedily devours your food and you take the narrow window of opportunity to sneak past it! Quickly now!

You carry on!

Continue



The Enchiridion

[Image]http://s2.boardgame-online.com/g/images/event/at_loot2.jpg
Oh, wow. You've found the one and only Enchiridion. This magic tome, also known as the Hero's Manual, is incredibly old. It possesses the power the cast a Wormhole spell, generating 5 Magic Crystals in the process!

item

Aaaaaadventure time!




Gotta Go Fast

You take a sprint and manage to outrun the big, slow lizard guard! You quickly open the dungeon door and run inside!

You wonder what dangers this place is gonna hold... and treasures...

Continue


Monster Encounter




You find yourself facing an opponent! It appears to be a ghost. Hrm... how do you defeat a ghost? What do you do?





Orb Of Magic

You throw a Magic Crystal at the Orb that you cleverly spotted in the room. The Orb immediately becomes charged with unstable magic and unleashes beams of holy energy around the room! The ghost is ripped apart by the light magic! Sweet, you're damn well taking this Orb with you!

item

You carry on!

Continue




Ouch!

You lunge yourself at the weak, slender lizard guard! Unfortunately you just cannot handle him with your bare hands...

He knocks you unconscious. Ouch...

Continue